Celebrity quotes of the week, 22 March

 'Who here actually thinks I would do 50 Shades of Grey as a movie? Like really. For real. In real life.'

EMMA WATSON DENIES REPORTS SHE HAS SIGNED ON TO PLAY ANASTASIA STEELE IN THE UPCOMING FIFTY SHADES FILM (Twitter)

 'People are saying, 'you’re so fat!' I’m like, dude, I’m pregnant! Social media gives people the guts to say mean things.'

KIM KARDASHIAN DEFENDS HER PREGNANCY WEIGHT GAIN (Us Weekly)

 'I am going to do everything in my power to have this relationship be private.'

ASHTON KUTCHER SAYS HE DOESN'T WANT HIS ROMANCE WITH MILA KUNIS TO BE AS HIGH-PROFILE AS HIS MARRIAGE TO DEMI MOORE (Elle)

 'I've been doing it too much... I need a break from myself as much as I imagine the audience does.'

RYAN GOSLING FANS MAY BE UPSET TO HEAR HE'S TAKING A BREAK FROM ACTING - TO DIRECT (AP)

 'I didn't grow up with a bunch of money [like Gwyneth], so my tips are much more grounded.'

IT'S THE WAR OF THE COOKBOOKS AS JESSICA ALBA COMPARES HER NEW BOOK TO GWYNETH PALTROW'S (New York Daily News)

 'What I have realised is there will be bumps in your life but the fun is fixing them. If it was always easy, life would be boring.'

SIMON COWELL OPENS UP IN A CONFESSIONAL TWITTER RANT (Twitter)

 'I actually wanted to be a soldier... I wanted to be [in the Army] when I was a kid.'

FOOTBALLER DAVID BECKHAM SAYS HE HAD A VERY DIFFERENT CAREER DIRECTION IN MIND WHEN HE WAS YOUNG (Daily Star)

'Guys relax, that was NOT me [at the nightclub]. I'm taking this seriously and focused on the road ahead.'

LINDSAY LOHAN DENIES REPORTS SHE WENT CLUBBING JUST HOURS AFTER A JUDGE SENTENCED HER TO THREE MONTHS IN REHAB (Twitter)

 'It's not hard to access that emotion when the person the song is directed at is standing by the side of the stage watching.

TAYLOR SWIFT CLAIMS THAT HER SINGLE I KNEW YOU WERE TROUBLE WAS WRITTEN ABOUT HARRY STYLES, REFERRING TO HER PERFORMANCE AT THE BRIT AWARDS (Times)

'That marriage was shaky from the get-go, before I’d even got off the elephant.'

RUSSELL BRAND ADMITS HIS MARRIAGE TO KATY PERRY WAS NEVER SOLID, AND JOKES ABOUT THE ELEPHANT HE RODE IN THE CEREMONY (XFM)

 'I'm open to it.'

KATIE HOLMES SAYS SHE IS OPEN TO HAVING MORE CHILDREN. SURI, HER DAUGHTER WITH TOM CRUISE, IS SIX (Allure)

 'A normal girl will just put the dress on and leave. I need them to be like an armory. I am 40 years old, I had a baby, and I am a 32F boob. And they are real still!'

MODERN FAMILY ACTRESS SOFIA VERGARA SAYS SHE NEEDS SOLID SUPPORT UNDERGARMENTS TO CONTAIN HER AMPLE BREASTS (Vogue)

'I was young, man! I was in f**king Vegas. I wasn't thinking.'

BRUNO MARS MAKES EXCUSES FOR HIS 2010 ARREST FOR COCAINE POSSESSION (GQ)

 'I'm good everybody. Thx for the prayers and love.'

RAPPER LIL WAYNE THANKS WELL-WISHES AFTER HE WAS HOSPITALISED WITH SEIZURES AND WAS REPORTEDLY NEAR DEATH (Twitter)

 'It's sacred ground... There's a reason Foo Fighters don't do Nirvana songs.'

FOO FIGHTERS FRONTMAN AND EX-NIRVANA DRUMMER DAVE GROHL SAYS THEY DON'T PERFORM NIRVANA TUNES OUT OF RESPECT FOR KURT COBAIN (NME)

 'The worst phone call ever.'

JON BON JOVI RECALLS THE MOMENT HE WAS TOLD OF HIS DAUGHTER STEPHANIE'S HEROIN OVERDOSE (Katie Couric)

'I’m going to marry Patrick... I’m going to officiate at his wedding.'

SIR IAN MCKELLEN WILL PRESIDE OVER X-MEN ACTOR PATRICK STEWART'S WEDDING TO SINGER SUNNY OZELL (The Jonathan Ross Show)